About my first cuckquean experience this summer

S

SexySamurai

Member
I want to share my first cuckquean experience. It happened this week.

All I want is to sincerely talk about everything here. Talk with people who can understand me and my feelings.

Admins, please move my post to another topic if it is not appropriate here. Thanks.

I am just a woman but my new boyfriend (surprise!) is cuckold. So my new boyfriend - D., has been spending all the recent days with another girl. Therefore, every day and every night I am just all alone. And I was crazy with this feeling of inaccessibility and my own helplessness to somehow fix it.

I want to look into his eyes, enjoy his amazing body, feel a connection with him... But I can't be with him. Because D. is not alone, every day and every night he is not alone...

I am glad that he has sex with this girl with whom they have been close for so long. But every time I have mixed emotions about the fact that this is happening in MY life. But it happens and ok, I accept it - he warned me about this at the beginning of the relationship.

I feel good when D. feels good. I feel VERY good when he feels very good. But at the same time I am losing the opportunity to be alone with him for many days. Then my VERY good mood multiplied by a VERY bad mood. And I got a strange result. I was going crazy. And I didn’t know what to do, because I don’t want to give him extra problems, because he already solves many of them.

His simple question “How are you” these days:
My usual answer: “Everything is ok with me! Well, or maybe almost ok...”
I am inside myself: “Someone please kill me so that this torture will stop...”

This round-the-clock inner hell is unbearable - when I have a boyfriend, but there is no sex or close connection with him for many days. I need at least just communication in private or a long correspondence - but no one has any time for it. So I am alone.

I don’t drink alcohol (usually I feel bad even after a couple of sips), but these days I get drunk... Again and again. Yes, my body was sick from alcohol. Very sick.
But that was much better than being without him. It was much better for my body and soul, so I chose many-many-many alcohol whenever the opportunity presented itself. Because the pain of the body drowns out the inner pain, which cannot be drowned out by anything. The piercing coldness of loneliness and ignorance of my existence…

When we are alone, I feel alive and strong, I feel that I can do everything and I like everything I do! Only next to my love this is available to me. But with each new day of my loneliness, I felt even more emptiness inside and greater desire to drink anything strong.

Every time I know that he is not with me, I understand that the fairy tale can end at any moment - the princess (me) will become an empty place, and the carriage (my exciting life with my love) will turn into a pumpkin. I take it for granted and live with this understanding every second. It helps me keep my emotions in check.

But there were so many days without his attention, without his beautiful body and mind, and voice, and his amazing cock (the best size for me, yeah...), which I love to feel inside me... I was confused, I was like a small child who was left alone for many days…

Yesterday I told him how much my crazy body misses him. Finally I told!

It was uneasy to talk about my body's needs because my ex-boys usually just ignored me.

Last night he invited me to meet. I've arrived. I didn't believe that I am alone with him again. So our relationship continues and even reaches a new, unfamiliar level.

I feel alive and young again. Only when I’m alone with him do I get the feeling that I’m at home. Now this feeling is even deeper and thinner. Every time I see him, it is so exciting. He makes me so horny! Always…

So, yesterday I got... (continue reading below)
 
S

SexySamurai

Member
...COMPLETE FREEDOM

My love gave me a lot of pleasure last evening.

From the first seconds it was SO exciting and sweet. And all my desire to get drunk disappeared in one moment.
We are together again!.. We are alone and no one is around. I can be completely myself again, and just get pleasure from every second when D. with me. He's the only one.

It was like ecstasy. But even better, much better - because it was not artificial, but alive. It was what I felt and it was cosmically beautiful!

Absolute freedom! Complete happiness! Complete openness! And the one who is the cause of all this is near. A wave of warmth, lightness and joy covered me ...

I thought that this amazing evening, when I got the long-awaited sweet moments, would end there. But I got another surprise - we spent the night together.
This night was the best of all my nights... A lot of love and only we are in it. And our bodies were together, many times.

This is the first night in my life...

#1. ... which inspired me to write

I never had such sex in my life that could inspire me be creative. Never before until I met D. So you can thank him for my story.

I have been writing texts and stories for as long as I can remember, about everything that I like. But I've never liked sex enough to make me want to write about it.

But I really wanted to preserve these precious moments in order to return to them as something important that no one will take from me (admins, I believe you will save every line on your nice and friendly forum).

#2. ... when I forgot about my complexes*
*(thanks to all my exes for them)

I (Is it possible with me !? Really?) did not think about my appearance or age or social status or other nonsense. I am just with my boyfriend. Every moment. I felt him. I enjoyed him. I touched him... And it was SO exciting!

#3. ... when I was alone with my love in the rain

I love nights. I love when it rains. But I've always been ALONE in this. There was nobody to share with me what I love.

All my guys from the past didn't want to spend time with me. They were not even interested in listening when I talk about myself.

Suddenly, D. is my treatment. The sweetest treatment I can imagine.
My treatment from the horrible past, which almost killed me and after which I avoided sex, and generally personal.
Because then they just used my body. It hurts too much to feel like an object…

#4. ... when we enjoyed each other not at home, but outside

I confess embarrassedly, I have not had such an experience yet. And the first try that night was really great!!!

It was so sweet that I didn't know what could be better. When he entered me, but at any second a stranger could come here and catch us behind this.
But it was even better when we cum together - it seems this was the best ending for my best night.

#5. ... when I was so close to another person

This should have been the first point, but to understand its meaning, you need to read the rest. So, it is the 5th.

I've never felt this close with any guy before. The fucking amazing proximity of bodies, minds and souls!..


And all these 5 points are closely related to emotions that I lived through all the days of my loneliness. I understand that one is impossible without the other.

That, just like in harmony, there is day and there is night. There is also a contrast in personal life that makes it bright. I understand it.

Anyway, all these 5 points are built on my 100% confidence/thrust in D.

#5, which shone for me that night, would not have been possible without our mutual understanding, I think so.
But we now have such a deep understanding only thanks to this cuckquean experience that I went through.

More than anything, I wanted to be closer to my boyfriend, to understand him better, to feel him better.

And now I finally feel how D. feels, when his girl leaves him for her boyfriend.
I understand it already not just with my mind but also within myself, through completely.

Because now I've gone through the same thing - what is an integral part of his life.

Since yesterday it has become a part of my life.

Samurai. 06/20/2021

___

I like to explore something new and exciting. So I choose this forum to do it. I want to stay here.
 
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Brandon Calimesa

Brandon Calimesa

Administrator
Really good job and well written. I could tell the ideas were just flowing from your mind. I would love to hear more details about the intimate moments (sex) you had with D. and what made it nice. You said it was outside? Wow, really? Were? How?

You also mentioned that he was not alone, had other girl, how did he have you stay with him if another girl is in his bed? Confusing sorry.
 
S

SexySamurai

Member
Brandon Calimesa said:
Really good job and well written.
Click to expand...
Thank you for your attention to such newbie like me, Brandon. I appreciate that and I like this friendly place. I share what is important to me and it is important for me to be heard.

Yes, it's incredibly exciting to do it outside the apartment! I really want to ask him to repeat it over and over again. I like the process itself, how in the conditions of ordinary city life you can get and give pleasure to each other. He licked my pussy and I sucked his dick and he fucked me. I liked everything, I liked it very much... It makes me really alive!

That another girl spent time with her boyfriend that day so I and D. were alone. So we had a lot of time to take fun.
 
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S

SexySamurai

Member
NeedMoreSexyMen said:
You are naughty and I like it. Hopefully you get more playtime soon.
Click to expand...
NeedMoreSexyMen, thank you for your kind support. Yes, this is my real nature, which was inaccessible to me for many years after my broken youth. Here (and when I am alone with my new boyfriend) I can connect to it and feel alive again.

So this place is also my remedy. My way to understand myself.
 
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S

SexySamurai

Member
My experience is still going on...

I and D. have not seen each other all these days.

The days that my boyfriend lives with another girl, and I am completely alone again.

I temporarily have no opportunity to feel him,
to talk to him,
to touch him,
to feel his dick...

Just a silence.

All I have - understanding what he is not alone now. Not so bad as it could be. So I almost satisfied.

But this time I do not feel the total void inside about what I wrote in this topic above.

My belonging to this forum and to its visitors, the opportunity to sincerely share my experiences, turned out to be very important to me. It fills me.

And at the same time, I do not take the precious time D. - usually I said him all this what I can just write here. When he was so busy at his work...

Yes, I can't resist this feeling and alone with him I always want to talk (or to be silent) about everything.

I love it.

So now I found another way to tell about my feelings. I just do it here.

Writing is my strong passion as you can notice if you read my stories here. Now my inner writer is happy. So me too.

After all, I'm just talking about my life here, but in the end it helps me so much. And a friendly support of all who I met here.

Life becomes more pleasant when there is someone who can understand your feelings. When you can feel alive, and talking not only about work every day.
Ability to discuss about everything that you feel without fearing to be inappropriate or ignored. It is so important to me.

It seems that this forum is the perfect place of life for the cuckquean.
 
S

SexySamurai

Member
A real family...
I finally know how it is.

We spent unforgettable hours with my new boyfriend.

I really don't know how he manages to surprise me every time.
But it happens. Over and over.

That time we had sex outside again. I liked it.
It was very pleasant and exciting to feel his penis every time he entered me...

I missed this sweet feeling so much.

Someone could say that our last (and first) outside sex (about which my first post) was better.
But there is no point in comparing. Because every time it fills me up.

And every time in different ways, like different snowflakes, among which you cannot find two identical ones.
And each in its own way is special and beautiful. Like having sex with D.

You cannot enter the same water twice.

This is also why what happened next is so valuable to me.

D. and I reached the sea late at night and met the dawn together - and at the same time in his cozy telephone conversation with his parents.
That's how I got to know them. D. proudly told them about me and my work...

I've only been in a relationship with D. for a few weeks. It's so little to get to know each other.
After all, these weeks are like a few beautiful moments... But.
I didn't feel like his girlfriend there. I didn't feel at all.

It seemed that we were in a different world.

From within myself, I was his wife in those minutes.

Together with him and his family.

It was so natural and harmonious that I just stayed with this new feeling of closeness to another person.
It softly flowed through me while I admired the dawn and D.
This picture was truly beautiful and worthy of the best galleries in the world...

A moment of fleeting dawn magic was imprinted in my memory, in which I (having had experience of marriage in the past) for the first time felt like a real wife.

Sounds like a fairy tale, doesn't it?

Now, when I write and relive these moments, I am sincerely happy for the main characters of this story. For us.
What I received then from the world and my love cannot be compared with diamonds, real estate, etc.
This is a Real gift for me, a gift for life.

This precious memory, this picture, for the opportunity to get which we paid with our sleepless day, will remain forever.
Truly worthwhile things are really expensive. And I was so lucky to be solvent then.

All I wanted until recently was just to be able to see D. again.
But besides that, I suddenly got something that I never dreamed of.
Feeling of family.

Truly, the most wonderful things happen suddenly.

And all we can do is not to miss them.

Every moment is precious. But...

True beauty can only be expressed by silence.

Our bright picture of dawn magic - ...
 
S

SexySamurai

Member
Cuckolding: My Best Reward..

These days I lived knowing that yesterday afternoon my boyfriend would be alone with a new, very young (but of course an adult) girl.
Before they had not had sex.

It made me a little more nervous.

All day X I could not work.
All I could do is thought only about how they would spend this time.
But she postponed the visit.

This waiting tightened my emotions more and more.

Closer to night she finally came.

Every couple hours I received some details of their communication from D.
It further excited me. I so much wanted everything to be ok so I could see my dear cuckold satisfied.

My brain refused to work, instead I imagined what they could do and how.
And more and more I felt wet between my legs from pleasant excitement for D.

When closer to the morning I passed out for a couple of hours, I dreamed about them having sex. I slept but i was like in reality.

I lived in his reality all night till he fucked her and then sent me reporting.

In the morning I woke up in my maybe best mood.
I was so happy for his first new sex as if it was my own first time!
Of course I was still excited and waiting for the opportunity to feel his strong dick again.

In the afternoon she left.
So my turn came.
I could not wait even a minute.

After all, I had been waiting for a day and all this time finally coming to an end.

It filled me with energy and pleasant excitement.

And this sex with D. was unforgettable for me. It was very very good.

I almost felt shining from D. satisfaction after his recent first experience, and also my own shining from joy for him.
It was a lot of pleasant sensations that he gave to my body and with which I was saturated inside just seeing him, touching him, feeling his taste by my mouth...

Just be happy with my happy D. Double exciting!
That was my reward this time, and it really was maybe the best experience for me.

First sex is really very filling...

And as I realized now, it is possible to feel this even if you do not participate.

However, thanks to the constant messages from D., all these hours I had the feeling of being there.
I appreciate his care. His messages supported me and make more horny, transfer me to him.
This experience opened for me a new depth of our personal life.

I see now, we really can understand each other and our feelings. Because we are

Cuckold and Cuckquean
 
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